8.11.2008

10 Things

{Image: Lucky Designs}

According to Yahoo, here are 10 things never to do at a wedding. Although I understand the reason behind it, I have to disagree with "Don't Come Bearing Gifts". I love to wrap gifts and I feel like I do such a better job that Macy's or Bed Bath and Beyond!

Don't Be Fashionably Late As the song says, get to the church on time! Allow enough time to get to there 15 minutes early or more no matter what weather, traffic, or other acts of divine intervention pop up. Print out directions to both the ceremony and the reception (if it's at a different location). Many a wedding has been hampered by guests who got lost and showed up an hour late.

Don't Produce Sound Effects While at a wedding and reception, turn off your Blackberries and cell phones, put them on vibrate, or better yet, don't even take them!

Don't Talk Trash It may sound obvious, but it happens all the time. No matter how big or how loud a wedding is, things get overheard. So, be on your best and most polite behavior. No gossip about any of the other guests. No complaining out loud about anything -- whether it's the food or the long line at the ladies' room. And no comparisons to other weddings! As far as the bride and groom are concerned, this is a perfect day, and so it should be!

Don't Come Bearing Gifts Whether you're planning on gifting the happy couple a Cuisinart or cold hard cash, do them a huge favor and don't bring it on the wedding day. If you do, they have to keep track of it and haul it home at the end of the night. Send the gift ahead of time, or after the actual ceremony -- at a time when they can really relax and enjoy it.

Don't Dress Down Whatever you choose to wear, make the effort to look your best for the bride and groom. They'll appreciate that you got dolled or duded up for the occasion. If the invitation doesn't specify dress code, put in a friendly email or call to the bride, groom, their parents, or attendants to get more info. Black Tie means you've got to dust off that long silk dress or rent a tux. If it's an outdoor affair, there may be more leeway, but get details on the location, so you can come prepared (because it's isn't fun to be traipsing around in the sand in your stilettos!).

Don't Bring Mr. or Ms. Random If you're single, choose your date carefully. If it's someone you've only been out with once, it may not be the best idea (could be awkward for you, your date, and the newlyweds). Same if it's someone you recently "sort of" broke up with. Weddings are intimate affairs and bringing in a stranger should be done with thought. Let the bride or groom know if you decide to come alone so they can seat you with other fun "ones!" And as much as you may love your kiddos, don't take them if children aren't invited.

Don't Steal the Show Wedding ceremonies take all forms -- from religious to poetic, musical, or humorous. Whatever the vibe, let the bride and groom set the tone and follow their lead. If you're normally a loud, life-of-the-party type, bring it down a notch and let the wedding couple stand out. If you're a weeper, bring tissues and sit where you can sob without disturbing the I Do's. If the ceremony includes religious rituals, find out what you should do (or not do) ahead of time.

Don't Pig Out If food is serve-yourself, avoid the buffet line stampede and wait until the crowd dies down. Also, avoid going back for thirds. Take a break and save room for cake! Seconds might be okay, once you've seen that everyone has eaten. If the food is served sit-down, eat what is served without requesting substitutions or omissions, unless you have a food allergy. Otherwise, pick delicately or chow down, but don't gripe that you "don't like fish." Worse comes to worst, you can hit Burger King on the way home!

Don't Drag Out Skeletons If the bride blushes, it should be from pride, joy, or sheer love. Not because someone just stood up and told a humiliating story about the loser she dated in high school! Ingratiate yourself to the lady and her groom by avoiding any potentially embarrassing or juvenile behavior -- no bawdy jokes, no tales about their dating habits or exploits, no overdrinking, and no overly sexy dancing. Have fun, but don't have it at anyone else's expense.
Don't Stockpile Party Favors At the end of the night, as you're saying your thank-yous and farewells, avoid the urge to hog all the super-cool (or yummy) party favors! You don't need to take some for people who weren't able to attend. You don't need extras. Take one for yourself, unless someone in the wedding party urges you to do otherwise.

4 comments:

Pam Dover said...

Those are some great pointers! I don’t agree with the “Don’t Bring Gifts” either, many guest are not invited to showers so the wedding day is a great opportunity to assure your gift reaches the bride and groom without worrying about things getting lost or broken in the mail.
I am getting married in 3 ½ weeks and a shattered set of dishes just arrived at my house for me and my future hubby…and exchanging it was such a hassle. More power to giving gifts at the wedding.
Also it is a perk to get money right before the honeymoon…I am hoping for this ha-ha.

MsKate said...

I am going to have to agree with the article. Gifts at a wedding are kind of a nuisance-someone has to watch them throughout the night to make sure nothing happens to them (read my blog about a wedding where wedding crashers stole all the gifts/gifts cards while posing as guests) and also, you've got to worry about collecting them after the wedding.

One thing the article didn't mention that is pretty basic but I still see if happen a lot is DO NOT wear white to a wedding unless you are the bride!!! Seriously!

April t. said...

I have to agree that lugging the gifts around was a PIA...but they were sooo pretty all stacked up and beautifully wrapped, it was worth the hassle (plus, It's not like I actually had to move them...that's what brothers are for)

Barbara said...

I want to comment on "don't trash talk". I am a videographer at weddings. I can't tell you how often I am filming and someone will look at me with sheer terror on their face and ask "was that recording?"